Swishhh.. swishhh.. came a tiny bit of flake of a paper written “thank you”, rustling with the wind, inside the window pane and landing on my lap.
The bus stopped just then- so did my breath. It was scrawled in a tiny childish writing – hardly readable. But I saw it alright and i read it too.
The word started to blur and the sounds surrounding me became a buzz to my ears.. I looked at the entwined hands of him and me- in blur..
I recalled back to our days of starting of love.. hands entwined and strings of hearts knotted together.. I was 18 he was 20- our smiles were infinite.
Our eyes spoke the words of love, heart throbbed with the desire of love. From awkward hugs to missing hugs.. From just a peck on the cheeks to intense love so it went..
Tangling in his arms became a safe heaven for me.. listening and remaking our talks for future became the favourite story to see..
When we grow old what shall we be? Together the children and grand children, you and then me..
A year and two gone.. my 20th birthday- his special gift for me. That ring sparkling on my pale skin promising a lifetime of togetherness. That feel of emotion and love hovering in the air- united us together and forever to our souls and hearts..
Then came the moment of unexpected event- to realize that I had gotten pregnant!
There was that moment of happiness a month ago and then here comes that moment so unexpected to us.
The fault was our- we got carried away in love. Neither we thought of safety nor we planned. His job was just started- not enough for to support a baby. As for myself – I was still a student – how could I manage a child?
A big question mark as to what to do?
Abortion was the only solution- question was how?
Abortion at the correct time- we had to decide just now?
Was the local hospital good enough? Would my tiny muchikin be safe?
Safe! That was what we exactly needed to focus upon.. we failed to do so once and the mistake shall not repeat again..
Despite the yearning we would have to take the safe step.. safe abortion for our safe future..
The bus started again.. and I felt his hand squeezing mine slightly watching my face in silence. I brushed my tears and looked into his and smiled.
His smile followed- hesitant yet it was there whispering silent words of thank you.
Thank you for being strong it said.. Thank you for giving him hope to recreate future together again..
My smile spoke words of thank you as well.. Thank you for supporting me all through. Thank you for the love and hardship together we have been through.
I felt the crumpled paper in my other hand. Perhaps I was wrong or maybe its just my imagination.. But I felt the thank you was from my muchikin above..
Thanking us for keeping him/her safe.. thanking us despite the fact he/she couldn’t see the world- safely did it go up above in heaven.
I put the paper in my bag and resting my head on the heaven of strong shoulder, with content safe smile on my face, riding the safe bus ride back home, thinking- I took my safe step to my future with a SAFE ABORTION, did you?
Lirisha Explores 